We'll always have the weather

Some local media mavens have been surprised and appalled by the extent to which the BeloJo and TV news have played stories on our recent winter weather (e.g., we got two inches of snow; a lot of people have the flu; the temperature dips below freezing) as if they were major news flashes. Hospitals filled to overflowing is indeed legitimate news, but it's hardly worthy of front-page or lead story treatment. This is dumb and dumber reportage at its finest.

The JARheads have certainly outdone themselves with their shocking "it's cold outside!" exposes. On Tuesday, January 18, Channel 10 led its 11 p.m. broadcast with Audrey Laganis duly reporting that it was not as cold as the night before, but still chilly. Wow! Bow-wow! Audrey held up a little plastic bottle of frozen water and described how the water was liquid when she put it in her car three hours earlier. This may have been a clever parody of the infamous Channel 12 report during the Brendel murder case of a decade ago, when Logan Crawford memorably dangled a turkey leg above a vat of acid. But, somehow, with institutional memories being what they are, we think not.

During the same newscast, Dan "Wonder Boy" Jaehnig, reporting on the effort by some in the civil rights community to have the word "plantation" removed from the state name, began his sign-off by saying, "live from the State House, I'm..." but then caught himself, realizing he was comfortably ensconced in the WJAR studios at the time. We can't blame a fella for wanting to stay warm.

Walking the plank

Having had the honor of emceeing the 2:1 Coalition to Preserve Choice's annual awards banquet last Friday night at the Edgewood Yacht Club in Cranston, Phillipe and Jorge's were quite impressed to see that George Dubya, he of the featherweight intelligence and portable stance on issues, came out with an actual stand (for now) on abortion. After dodging pointed questions from the media for weeks about just what his position was, he announced his support for the GOP national platform plank -- a far-right agenda item that would prohibit abortions even in the cases of rape, incest or threats to the mother's life. Compassionate conservative that he is, Dubya announced his stand on the eve of the anniversary of the Roe v. Wade decision. After a night of honoring abortion clinic escorts who brave Arctic temperatures at 6 a.m., verbal abuse and physical threats from anti-abortion activists, we found Dubya's lack of courage and pandering to the lunatic fringe quite inspiring.

But the bright side of Georgie's going into the tank for the Christian right (don't forget Dubya's born-again) is that it may bite him in the butt down the road. P&J's old pal, Brown University political guru Darrell West says, "I am not surprised Bush is running on a pro-life platform, given the fact that he signed a parental notification bill in Texas. But I was taken aback that last week he came out for a pro-life constitutional amendment that does not even include exceptions in cases of rape, incest and life of the mother. Even other conservative Republicans respect the validity of those particular circumstances. This is one thing he has done (or been forced to do) during the nominating process that will come back to haunt him in the general election."

Jeez, Darrell, you mean that old Governor Numbnuts might not make his own decisions? Whomever his opponent is, let's hope he takes ample time at every appearance to remind voters who really cares about individual's lives.

Taking a hike

Nice to see that two top executives at the Narragansett Council of the Boy Scouts of America are showing the kind of virtues they embrace by heading for the hills. This after the furor over a gay Eagle Scout being prohibited from working at Camp Yawgoog once his sexual preferences became known. Executive director Lyle Antonides retired to become a fund-raiser for a private school, and Anthony Gibbs, the director of field services, is taking another job with the Scouts in Chicago, where they no doubt have an easier job discriminating against those who exhibit superior behavior.

This departure with tail between legs is reminiscent of those legislators who, on the verge of being exposed for suspect behavior, resign to "spend more time with my family." (Honk!) Unfortunately, the new director, David Anderson, a board member of an upstate New York Boy Scout council, plans on avoiding the current controversy that has resulted in major Boy Scout funders demanding a change in the policy, telling the Urinal that he has no plans to try to change the anti-gay policies of his local chapter or that of the national organization. Instead, perhaps he can push for a merit badge for cowardice. P&J know who the first three people to earn it will be.

Phil won't be fooled again

Kudos to the Phoenix production manager and amateur astronomer, "Fabulous" Phil Maigret, who pointed out to your superior correspondents how the Urinal of January 17 included a five-graf Knight-Ridder story on A4 with the hed, "Dark side of the moon will be visible Thursday." The story, about a total lunar eclipse, describes how "the moon doesn't become completely dark during most lunar eclipses. It takes on a reddish hue because the earth's atmosphere bends part of the sun's light around the earth and toward the moon." The fact is that "the dark side of the moon" is never visible from the earth and, sure enough, the story didn't indicate that it would be. Apparently, there are a few too many Pink Floyd fans over at the Other Paper who would sacrifice accuracy for a jazzy reference to their favorite group. Phil, who tends to favor roots and punkish garage music, was not fooled the first time, but we just couldn't restrain ourselves from making another rock 'n' roll reference in our own headline.

Belo job

P&J were surprised to see our buddies at the Providence Business News recently lambaste another of our pals, Robert Whitcomb, the Other Paper's editorial page editor. (That's our job, dammit!) At issue was a Urinal editorial about the Time Warner/ America Online merger that warned against the possibility of news distortion when so much of the media is controlled by so few companies. In light of the Belo Company's ownership of other media outlets, PBN thought this piece smacked of hypocrisy.

Whitcomb expressed some bafflement to P&J, since his editorial discussed the perils of total control over information, rather than the fears of bottom-line-driven cutting of staff and resources by Belo when the Dallas-based company took over the Urinal in 1997. That was a very real issue at the time, especially given the absentee owner status of Belo management; It's much easier to fire people when you know you might not run into them in the local supermarket the next day. Most of Belo's current expansion has been into high-tech delivery mechanisms, rather than purveying information to the great unwashed. When it comes to telling it like it is, this raises the possibility of huge conflicts of interest.

One thing that grabbed our eye in the PBN piece was a reference to the "Providence Belo Journal." C'mon, Messrs. Prosnitz and Pare, just write BeloJo like you wanted to, and give credit to your superior correspondents.

It simply isn't so

Note to Senate Majority Leader Paul "Slappy" Kelly: No, you don't let a big-time State House lobbyist stay with you at your Florida condo for free on a golf holiday. Yes, it's ethically wrong and looks bad to the public. Now for God's sake, try to be a good boy for once.

Get smart

A nice little item in the New York Times' Metropolitan Diary of January 24, describing a scale in a doctor's office in the Big Apple: To help alleviate the embarrassment of being overweight, the physician has attached a sign that says, "Pretend it's your IQ."

Old business

Last week, P&J wondered aloud what the hold-up has been on fixing the water main break on Point Street. Besides the negative impact on businesses in the area and the re-routing of all the RIPTA buses and trolleys, there is the issue of the expense to Providence taxpayers of police details that, for weeks, were stationed in the area, collecting extra pay. We also received this letter from one of our favorite restaurateurs at Point and Richmond streets.

Dear P&J,

Thank you for mentioning our water main problem. We have been fighting this for three weeks. We have also gotten no definite answers as to when it will be finished. But we have gotten responses when the date that they swore [the work would be concluded] by went by, like, "What are you going to do, arrest me?" Nice attitude while our business is sinking. Thank you again and keep up the good work.

Olga Bravo, Olga's Cup and Saucer

We continue to wait for the problem to be solved.

Trouble in Pazmania

It's a truly sad state of affairs for our favorite boxing champ, Vinny Paz. Our thoughts are that, unfortunately, tempers flared on both sides when Vinny was stopped by the Pawtucket police for alleged driving while intoxicated and, in the words of the champ, "things got out of control." We can believe that an irked middleweight did get somewhat verbally abusive, but we find it hard to believe that he assaulted anyone. We've known the champ since he first started his professional career, and the thought that he would take a swing at anyone outside of the ring is a bit hard to believe. Despite his wild man reputation, Vinny has a long history of being pretty disciplined while out of the spotlight. We'll probably never get a real handle on what actually transpired, but we certainly hope it won't jeopardize the filming of the Citizen Kane of dwarf-tossing movies that Pazienza is to start shooting this spring.

---

The P & J archive

---