Guy Dufault’s loose lips And how do you spell comatta, anyway?

Does Vo Dilun know how to do reality TV or what? Last Sunday, the same three-dozen people who call in to talk radio shows, write cranky letters to the editor, and spend entirely too much time discussing Charlie Bakst’s latest haircut were tuned in to Guy Dufault’s The Real Deal TV show. (Your superior correspondents are, of course, proud members of this mini-crowd.)

What we got this time, however, was the real Real Deal, since the show ran sans ads and PSAs in its initial raw state. And raw it was. Anyone catching the first few minutes witnessed a conspiratorial scene featuring Sonny and Fredo . . . er, we mean Dufault and Mike Levesque. In hushed tones, they discussed how Charlie Fogarty’s gubernatorial campaign has been less than electrifying, and how the only way to beat Governor Carcieri is, as Dufault put it, "is bring the other guy down." Fortunately, Guy can help with this since, as the former Democratic chieftain crowed, he’s "got the names of the past comattas," and is going to "start throwin’ ’em out there." (In case you’ve been living under a rock, Dufault has apologized for airing "unsolicited, anonymous, and uncorroborated" info.)

Of real interest to your superior correspondents is the response from the Republican Levesque, which might bury him next to Dufault: "I told you when he first popped on the scene. That that was the big worry."

When it comes to parsing Comattagate, first, there’s the word itself. In political/media circles you hear the phrase "comatta" a lot, generally in reference to Halitosis Hall. It’s a word basically understood to mean "mistress." Now, thanks to the extremely loose lips (and even looser brain) of Guy Dufault and other individuals, we are faced with having to figure out the correct spelling. On Monday evening, the Web sites of WJAR (Channel 10), and WPRI (Channel 12) went with "goumada." At Casa Diablo, odds were on "cumada." When the Other Paper came out on Tuesday morning, it spelled the word "comatta."

Since this is Italo-American street slang, and not the kind of thing you can look up in the AP stylebook, there may not be a correct spelling. Numerous attempts by P&J to contact the producers of The Sopranos proved fruitless, but we had to make a decision with deadline approaching, so decided to follow the lead of this state’s leading organ. This is primarily because the BeloJo employs ace reporter Scott MacKay, who has mastered the pronunciation of comatta through years of covering Rhode Island politics.

So, what’s the real deal and the damage on this so far? The "politics of personal destruction" appear to have worked as far as Guy Dufault is concerned. His career may have taken a significant hit, at least for the time being. His consulting business, and whether he ends up caddying at Wannamoisett next spring, would seem to be a real concern.

J. Michael Levesque may have to switch parties really soon. Although he is probably is a true believer in all the stupid laissez-faire/Reagan/voodoo economics crap that is driving the gigantic gap between rich and poor in this country, his championing of the West Warwick casino, and his closeness to the likes of Dufault, could spell problems. How many other Republicans in the state will embrace Mikey boy now?

Regardless of the trials and tribulations generated by this technical gaffe (and remember, the more that everyone is on TV, the more it could happen to anyone), your superior correspondents salute you for inspiring a classic P&J column item.

DUMB AND DUMBER

We got a recent e-mail from ESPN, the self-absorbed sports channel with a bunch of imbecilic announcers (save Bob Ley). These quad jock clowns think themselves the cleverest people on earth, and the sole reason that folks tune in, rather than to actually see sports highlights.

Back to our so-special e-mail. It begins:

Dear Sports Fan,

Recently, [news reader] Trey Wingo challenged you to enter the Sporture Chamber. It’s the sports equivalent of the Thrilla in Manila — a knockdown, drag-out sports trivia slugfest that’s not for the weak of heart.

As we torture prisoners at Abu Ghraib and in "black holes" in other countries, to the detriment of our national interest, might ESPN choose a better promotional route? We think so. After 9/11, much was made of not using war allusions in sports since our soldiers, tossed by Dubya into Afghanistan, were the ones actually "doing battle."

Speaking of this, Mr. Torquemada, Boy George was out there in Panama, declaring, "We do not torture," a blatant lie that we thought beyond even the prevaricating White House.

Despite all the news reports about US-sponsored torture, Dubya continues to be the "boy in the bubble." The more this little twerp travels outside of the country, the worse the global opinion of all Americans. Junior Bush, possibly the worst president in our history, has done more to undermine the reputation of our nation and to put more people in harm’s way under false premises than any other leader of this country.

Let’s see: 2035 brave US troops dead, tens of thousands horribly wounded, and still counting on both fronts. Bring ’em on! Mission accomplished!

RIP, WILLIE POWELL

Last week, your superior correspondents noticed an obituary for Willie Powell of Providence. We want to pause to salute this wonderful man. In the early 1970s, Jorge worked at the O’Rourke Children’s Center, then a state agency that, for all intents and purposes, functioned as a state orphanage. Willie Powell was one of the backbones of the recreation staff there, and he remained so for many years. He spent his life trying to improve opportunities for young people, in many instances instilling a sense of responsibility and discipline in kids from very rough backgrounds. He made a real difference in a lot of young lives. He was a good man.

KUDOS + CONGRATS . . .

. . . to New York Times columnist Frank Rich, for reminding us, on the eve of Veterans Day, about the military’s atrocious lying concerning the death of Pat Tillman, the former NFL star who turned his back on a multi-million dollar salary to enlist in the Army after 9/11. Fellow Rangers inadvertently shot him to death while on a mission in Afghanistan; friendly fire is the wonderful euphemism used by the Pentagon. Like "collateral damage," the phrase used to describe the 50 innocent people killed by a missile aimed at one person. The military lied to Tillman’s family about his death, served up a heaping plate of patriotic BS to the public about their poster boy, and got exposed five weeks later. Can anyone say, "Saving Private Jessica Lynch," another fictional Audie Murphy-style fairy tale cooked up by the defense chiefs? Anyone starting to see a pattern? Shucks, just a mistake. Nice work, Frank.

. . . to the amusing folks, who, incensed by the success of the film, Good Night, and Good Luck, keep sending the BeloJo letters to the editor, arguing that Senator Joe McCarthy was a hero. Yes, friends, we’re familiar with the Verona Papers and all of the more recent research into the communist infiltration of the US after WWII. But McCarthy actually busted very few real communists. His specialty (other than alcoholism and morphine addiction) was destroying the lives of hundreds of people whose only "crime" was to have flirted with communism in the 1930s. No big-time spies, no Alger Hiss-type characters for Joey boy. He went after actors and artists who posed no threats. And his primary motivation was to celebrate himself. Sorry, gang, the revisionism can only go so far for McCarthy. Joey boy was scum. We are amused, however, by your silly letters, so keep ’em up — Ann Coulter forever!

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